We want to have a baby, but…?
December 8th, 2009 | by admin |My husband and I have been together for a year…I am 22; he is 32. We live in a nice, two-bedroom mobile home, which is rent-to-own; it’ll be ours in eight years. We are settled into our jobs; I am a daycare teacher, and he works at an Italian restaurant as a pasta cook. We have a running vehicle; it’s old, but it gets us to work and back! Now, we are both considering the next big step: parenthood. [I know I’m young, but I am not a party girl, so I feel that I am mature and ready to be a mother, a good mother.]
As much as I want a child, however, I am terrified! My biggest concern is money.
First, I have no problems with living frugally. In fact, I live thusly…I buy clothes from Goodwill to save us money, and we budget each month. We actually end up with a surplus of several hundred dollars per month, every month. [I plan to have a couple thousand dollars in savings before the child we may have is born.]
Admittedly, though, I doubt we will ever make more than $25,000 a year, combined. Does this mean we should never have a child? I hope not! But, it’s the harsh reality I am facing. What if there is never a "right time" for us?
I hope I don’t sound like money is the most important thing. I just want to do what’s best for our child…
You sound far more ready for parenthood than many people far older, not to mention a good deal of the people posting questions here. You live within your means, or so it sounds, and even save money each month. Good for you!
Money IS important, so there’s nothing wrong with thinking about it.
If you will need child care while you’re both are work (if you can’t take the baby with you), then you need to figure out those costs, the how much diapers will be (look into BumGenius fitted cloth diaper – they don’t leak, AND save money!!), etc.. If you feel comfortable setting that much money aside for a child’s expenses, then go for it. In fact, I get the feeling your child will grow up knowing the value of a dollar and how to budget. GOOD things!
You don’t need to be rich to raise a child, just careful with the money you do have, and you sound very well prepared. So I whole-heartedly say go for it!!
9 Responses to “We want to have a baby, but…?”
By Jenn on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
You can figure out how to make it work. When you are ready things will fall into place. It sounds like you know how to stretch your dollar… and that is what counts. There are tons of people who make twice as much money as you do who don’t know what it means to sacrifice and live frugally. Love and dedication are the keys to making a family work not a big paycheck.
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Mother of two on a tight income.
By babyphat on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
ahhh ok well my friends on welfare with 3 kids and she gets by pretty fine
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By sunnie on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
Sweetie, you’ll never be able to AFFORD a baby… They’re expensive…
That said – go for it! No one can afford a baby, and if you wait untill you can, you’ll never have one.
You’ve heard the old saying money can’t buy happiness… well, its true. Money won’t make a happy home for your baby, you and your husband will do that!
Good luck, whatever you decide.
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Mom of 5, living on a budget… never gonna be rich.
By Fannie In Luv With Her Baby Girl on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
The most important thing for a child is not money. One can be very happy and never even realize he’s not as rich as the neighbour.
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My dad died when I was 1 yrs old. My brothers were 5 and 6 and my dad had left insurance money but we were far from rich. My mom was SAHM and she had to go back to work. And still, I had a very very happy childhood. All I remember is being loved and cherished.
There is NEVER a "right time"… for no one.
By tlent on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
As long as you have time,energy, love for a child it’s the right time.
The more you make the more you will spend. I would start saving now to get a nest egg. Good luck!
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By Mrs. Janes on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
It sounds to me like you have a lot of love to give and a child and experience from your employment. Times are definitely tough for everyone. My husband and I were in the same "should we wait? What are we waiting for?" stage. Basically, we established that we are 100% committed to starting a family and we will do everything we can to ensure that when our little bundle of joy arrives we give him/her the best life we possibly can. So my advice is that if you are seriously concerned about finances, do everything you can to plan and establish stable finances (as best you can!). I don’t think anybody is ever ready for a baby. People have been raising children on less than your salary forever. Your maternal instinct will allow you to do whatever it takes to make sure your baby is provided for. Just make sure this is what you really want. If you’ve only been together for a year it might be nice to spend some time really enjoying your husband’s company – afterall you will have your entire life together to raise children. As for your age, I am 23 and my husband and I are trying to have our first. If you are sure this is what you want – then do the best you can to prepare, and that’s all anyone can try to do. Best of luck in whatever you decide! Take care,
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By Katie X on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
Dollface, I’m a single mom currently living under the poverty line. Through a series of fortunate events I was able to secure my own home and refinance before I left on maternity (and was not allowed to return… le sigh), so I have a good, affordable home in a tree-lined neighborhood with supportive family about 30 minutes away…
and my son is turning out beautifully!
I wouldn’t have it any other way. I think the only thing a child can learn coming from a frugal household is character and the worth of a dollar- both of which help EVERYONE go far in life.
Good luck and baby dust!
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By Kiley K on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
it depends on how mature you are, i was 22 when i had my first child. if moneys a problem, then try to add a new job, like work as a waitress or something after daycare. my friend’s son is17 and his girlfriend got pregnant. hes still in high school, so he goes to school, then drives to borders to work as a clerk, then speeds to a resturant to work as a waiter, and has just took on the job as a cashier at a WAWA till 11 oclock at night, then goes home, does his homework, and starts it all over again the next day, all for his baby. maybe you could get a job that pays more, and beleave me, i know its not easy to just "get a job". if you don’t think ur ready, then don’t have the baby. rememeber, the child matters most, if you don’t think you can give him a good life, and provide for him, then wait till your a little bit more ready. haha, and i buy some of our clothes at goodwill to!! i love goodwill!! its the same exact clothes, for great prices!!! but, anyway, if you give him lots of love he’ll have the best life ever!!! good luck!! i hope everything works out perfectly!!
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mom of 7 with 2 on the way!!
By Aria on Dec 8, 2009 | Reply
You sound far more ready for parenthood than many people far older, not to mention a good deal of the people posting questions here. You live within your means, or so it sounds, and even save money each month. Good for you!
Money IS important, so there’s nothing wrong with thinking about it.
If you will need child care while you’re both are work (if you can’t take the baby with you), then you need to figure out those costs, the how much diapers will be (look into BumGenius fitted cloth diaper – they don’t leak, AND save money!!), etc.. If you feel comfortable setting that much money aside for a child’s expenses, then go for it. In fact, I get the feeling your child will grow up knowing the value of a dollar and how to budget. GOOD things!
You don’t need to be rich to raise a child, just careful with the money you do have, and you sound very well prepared. So I whole-heartedly say go for it!!
References :